Richard Watson

Utterly tedious and vacuous. I cant believe that the whole movie turns out to be exactly what it appears to be in the first 10 minutes - they are going to spend the whole movie getting to the top of the mountain overcoming jungle perils along the way. That's it. Even the perils are completely atrocious - 'help!, Im drowning in quicksand, Im going under, Ive gone, no wait! Im saved' - for goodness sake. "We're in a cave but the hole is too small. We have to crawl in a tiny space. Oh no! there's been a cave in!", "A big asteroid is coming! The clock is ticking. Will we get away in time?!' (I wont spoil it for you, yawn). Etc. Etc. Not a single bit of acting or drama to credit it - there isnt even any dialogue because the two characters cant speak the same language - so there's nothing complex for them to be dramatic about (except "Im afraid" and "phew that was close"). Not a single plot twist or anything. Dull, boring, predictable, pointless. How can they possibly spend all this money on making and distributing a movie and not have anything better to do than this - just some dinosaur special effects and a cast of two - made in lockdown, I presume. But even if that's all you can manage in lockdown, there's no excuse for plots taken from a 1960s Tarzan movie - "oh a wild animal is coming! run!" - "If only we could speak the same language", etc, etc.. [I wish that zero stars was an option]