Yash Deshpande

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SEVEN-STAR REVIEW: Playboi Carti’s I AM MUSIC Is a Chaotic Masterpiece for the Post-Genre Apocalypse Playboi Carti’s I AM MUSIC isn’t an album—it’s a 24/7 neon riot crammed into 30 tracks, a lawless parade of anarchic beats, unholy collabs, and Carti’s signature demon-baby incantations. This isn’t music; it’s a sonic exorcism, and we’re all possessed. Buckle up. Tracklist as a Treasure Map to Chaos From the opener POP OUT (a bass-blasted war cry for the Whole Lotta Red faithful) to the haunting closer SOUTH ATLANTA BABY (a glitched-out lullaby drenched in Auto-Tune tears), Carti curates chaos like a mad scientist. Highlights: CRUSH (Ft. Travis Scott): A dystopian love song where Travis’s Auto-Tune croons duel Carti’s ad-libs in a cathedral of synths. EVIL J0RDAN: A demonic trap-punk anthem with a beat that sounds like a chainsaw revving in a haunted mall. MOJO JOJO (Ft. Kendrick Lamar): Kung-Fu Kenny drops a verse so sharp it slices through Carti’s fog of ad-libs. Instant classic. RATHER LIE (Ft. The Weeknd): Abel’s velvet falsetto floats over a beat that’s equal parts After Hours noir and Vamp delirium. HBA: The viral titan (968.9K streams and climbing)—a minimalist rage anthem that’s already the soundtrack to 10 million TikTok edits. Production: A Collision of Genius and Insanity Carti’s producers (F1LTHY, Art Dealer, et al.) weaponize sound. CHARGE DEM HOES A FEE sounds like a trap banger filtered through a broken GameBoy, while COCAINE NOSE pairs industrial clangs with a nursery rhyme flow. The beat switch on GOOD CREDIT (Ft. Kendrick Lamar)? A five-star Michelin mindfuck. Features: Carti’s Cult Recruits the A-List Travis Scott haunts three tracks like a phantom, Future morphs into a raspy oracle on TRIM, and Lil Uzi Vert & Carti reunite on JUMPIN—a hyperpop-punk moshpit anthem. Even Jhené Aiko floats into the fray on BACKD00R, bending her ethereal vocals into Carti’s void. Controversy? Obviously. At 30 tracks, I AM MUSIC is bloated, messy, and unapologetic. Purists will rage at DIS 1 GOT IT (“Is this even a song?!”), and parents will disown you if OPM BABI’s seizure-inducing 808s blast through the walls. But that’s the point—Carti doesn’t care. This is art for the ADHD generation. The Verdict I AM MUSIC is a cultural reset disguised as a rap album. It’s TikTok’s sleep paralysis demon, a moshpit at the end of the world, and Carti’s magnum opus all at once. Seven stars? The scale exploded. Essential Tracks (For the Initiated): HBA (obviously) MOJO JOJO (Ft. Kendrick Lamar) RATHER LIE (Ft. The Weeknd) EVIL J0RDAN CRUSH (Ft. Travis Scott) Play This If You: Think “cohesive albums” are for cowards. Want to hear Kendrick Lamar rap over a beat that sounds like a UFO crash. Believe music should feel like mainlining glitter. Rating: ★★★★★★★ (7/5) — A++ I AM MUSIC isn’t for the faint of heart. But for the rebels, the nightwalkers, the “I need 10 Red Bulls before noon” crowd? It’s immortality.

Music

134 likes

Lo, I hath embarked upon the digital realm of "Omori," only to be met with a profound disappointment most grievous. This venture into the depths of melancholy and despair doth falter in its execution, rendering what could have been a poignant tale into naught but a tedious ordeal. The art, though passable in its visage, doth lack the spark of true creativity, appearing as but a pale imitation of better works. The narrative, which promiseth depth and emotion, doth unravel in confusion and incoherence, leaving the player adrift in a sea of ennui. The gameplay, intended to engage and immerse, is marred by a monotonous and repetitive nature. The mechanics, lacking in innovation, doth sap the spirit and render the journey a laborious chore. Characters, who should be vessels of empathy, are instead hollow and unrelatable, their plights failing to stir the heart or mind. The soundtrack, which should elevate the experience, is but a series of mournful dirges that doth weigh heavily upon the soul, compounding the sense of despair. Verily, "Omori" aspires to greatness, but is shackled by its own shortcomings, leaving the player with naught but a sense of profound disillusionment. In conclusion, I must advise all who seek enjoyment and edification to steer clear of this dismal offering. "Omori" is a lamentable misstep in the world of gaming, deserving of but a single star—a testament to its tragic failure.

Omori

2 likes

Hark! Lend me thine ears, for I have witnessed a spectacle so foul, it maketh my very soul recoil. "Skibidi Toilet," a woeful endeavor, doth offend the senses in ways most egregious. This grotesque parody of entertainment lacks the wit, charm, and substance of any art worthy of time's investment. Verily, the animation be crude, akin to the scribblings of a child whose talents are yet unshaped. The narrative, if such a chaos can be called, doth wander aimlessly like a ship lost at sea, with no star to guide its course. Characters of base demeanor and unseemly jest do prance about in a manner most vexing to the spirit. The dialogue, a torturous onslaught upon mine ears, doth resemble the prattlings of fools, void of all sense and decency. The pacing, erratic and unbalanced, leaves one in a state of bewilderment and dismay. Yea, rather than a joyous diversion, "Skibidi Toilet" is a harrowing ordeal that doth plague the mind with its ineffable folly. In sooth, I would not subject mine enemies to this accursed viewing. Seek thee other pastimes, for this one is naught but a blight upon the fair name of entertainment. Thus, I do decree, with all the force of mine indignation, that "Skibidi Toilet" is most assuredly deserving of but a single star—a mark of its utter failure and disgrace.

Skibidi Toilet

111 likes

I had high hopes for "The Finals," but this game turned out to be a massive disappointment. Despite its flashy graphics and promising trailers, the actual gameplay is a complete mess. The controls are clunky and unresponsive, making it incredibly frustrating to play. The server issues are rampant, with constant lag and frequent crashes that ruin any chance of a smooth experience. The matchmaking system seems broken, pitting beginners against seasoned players and creating an unbalanced, unfair playing field. The developers also seem to have prioritized microtransactions over actual game content, pushing players to spend more money on cosmetics rather than focusing on improving the core game mechanics. The storyline, if you can call it that, is bland and uninspired, lacking any real depth or engagement. Overall, "The Finals" fails to live up to its hype and leaves much to be desired. Save your time and money, and look elsewhere for your gaming fix.

THE FINALS

7 likes

Star Wars: The Last Jedi is the worst Star Wars movie ever made. It is a complete disaster that ruins everything that made Star Wars great. It was written and directed by Rian Johnson, who clearly has no clue about Star Wars or its fans. It features a bunch of new and old characters that are either boring, annoying, or completely out of character. The film was released in December 2017 and made over $1.3 billion worldwide, but only because people were tricked by the hype and the nostalgia. The film follows Rey as she tries to convince Luke Skywalker, the last Jedi Master, to help her fight against Kylo Ren and the First Order. But Luke is a grumpy old man who has given up on the Force and wants to die alone. He throws away his lightsaber, drinks green milk from an alien cow, and tells Rey that the Jedi are a failure and should end. Meanwhile, General Leia Organa leads the Resistance fleet in a slow and boring chase from the First Order, who can somehow track them through hyperspace. Along the way, they meet some new allies and enemies who are either useless or evil. They also reveal some secrets that are either lame or stupid. The Last Jedi is a terrible film that tries to be different and edgy, but ends up being insulting and nonsensical. It destroys the legacy of the original trilogy and the characters we love. It also contradicts or ignores the previous films and the established lore of the Star Wars universe. The film has awful visuals, lame action sequences, annoying music by John Williams, and wooden performances by the cast, especially Hamill and Fisher in their ruined roles. The film also has some humor that is not funny at all, and some subplots that are pointless or ridiculous. The film wastes too much time on characters and storylines that we don’t care about, such as Finn and Rose’s casino adventure, Poe’s mutiny, or Rey and Kylo’s force Skype calls. The film also makes some decisions that are infuriating or baffling, such as Leia’s space flight, Snoke’s death, Luke’s projection, or Rey’s parents. Overall, Star Wars: The Last Jedi is a horrible film that betrays and disrespects Star Wars and its fans. It is not a Star Wars film, but a mockery of it. It deserves to be forgotten and erased from history.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

9 likes