Ryan Fludder

The farts I passed from the 5 tacos I ate prior to watching this film had more substance and more to say than this 3 an a bit hour documentary about a planet I couldn’t care less about, that didn’t even have David Attenborough narrating. I was kind enough to walk out of the cinema to fart as I wanted to spare my fellow audience members the pain of smelling what had come out of me, but then I realised it wasn’t half as bad as the stench coming off the screen. It also took me 30 minutes to gather the strength to go back into the theatre, and even with that the movie was 3 hours too long.