Well I can say hand on heart that i have had a tormented life of nightmares, disturbing dreams and bad tempers all based around three obnoxious people Paul Clarke, Julian Simmons and Frank Mitchell.
I have never liked the amateurishness and parochialism of the UTV at the best of times but when are these three people just going to retire, leave, or be shunted into the shadows. How much longer are these 'faces' and voices, and irritating fake smiles, going to be allowed to destroy our sanity?
Simmons frankly thought he was God's gift to to the viewing public for decades with his introduction to Coronation St and and those cringing effeminate impersonations of Vera Duckworth. He drove me to the depths of despair and I always wondered when is this man going to shunted off to the shadows of backstage work with the prop men.
Frank Mitchell is another crushing bore who also suffers from the notorious 'UTV I'm a celebrity newscaster virus'. A narcissist like Simmons this guy thought he was God's gift to the public with his terrible hosting of that dreadful School Around the Corner show and one day when his face appeared on the screen I came near to hurling a brick at the TV set. Worst still the decades of torment inflicted on the public with his terrible weather watcher's conundrum and that cringing 'Ta Ta, Be Good, Take care routine'. Like Simmons this presenters has destroyed the happiness of tens of thousands of lives over generations. Put him out to the shadow of the back stage where he and Simmons can bore the prop team to death.
As for Paul Clarke, well I'm already in the throes of convulsing at this very moment just thinking about him! The man whose 'spiritual journey' brought him from Catholicism to Presbyterianism remains the darling boy of the entire 'Ulster is British', 'This is Our Wee Country' Unionist community and the vile and evil Orange Order who adore him and probably have pictures of him placed next to King Billy in their House of Orange HQ in east Belfast. Having achieved notoriety among the general Nationalist community in the North East and throughout Ireland for his annual 'adoration' broadcasts of the Twelfth of July Parades, UTV still refuses to sideline him. This man waxes lyrical every year about the wonderful lodges passing by on Dublin Rd on their way to the 'Field'. The 'wonderful 'Temperance Lodges, the wonderful 'charitable and fund raising Lodges' these great men and women of this 'fine up standing organization', models of benevolence,decency, morality, that one could proud off... He seems to have forgotten in his infamous praise and obvious euphoria and ecstasy at the mere sight of these morons that this is an avowedly anti Catholic organization, predicated on bigotry, hatred, religious intolerance, discrimination, triumphalism, violence and oppression of the north east's Catholic and Nationalist population. The terrifying years of Drumcree violence, Ardoyne stand offs, blockading roads, civil unrest, and bloodshed caused by this evil organisation all conveniently brushed under the carpet in his commentary and praise; usually concluding with how wonderful this evil parade is for 'the tourism industry'!.
When are these people, finally after decades of tormenting the public, destroying our lives, our health, our sanity, finally going to be shunted away to the 'UTV past their sell by date Knacker's Yard for 3rd rate crushing bores!!