Brendan Muldoon

Well I can say hand on heart that i have had a tormented life of nightmares, disturbing dreams and bad tempers all based around three obnoxious people Paul Clarke, Julian Simmons and Frank Mitchell. I have never liked the amateurishness and parochialism of the UTV at the best of times but when are these three people just going to retire, leave, or be shunted into the shadows. How much longer are these 'faces' and voices, and irritating fake smiles, going to be allowed to destroy our sanity? Simmons frankly thought he was God's gift to to the viewing public for decades with his introduction to Coronation St and and those cringing effeminate impersonations of Vera Duckworth. He drove me to the depths of despair and I always wondered when is this man going to shunted off to the shadows of backstage work with the prop men. Frank Mitchell is another crushing bore who also suffers from the notorious 'UTV I'm a celebrity newscaster virus'. A narcissist like Simmons this guy thought he was God's gift to the public with his terrible hosting of that dreadful School Around the Corner show and one day when his face appeared on the screen I came near to hurling a brick at the TV set. Worst still the decades of torment inflicted on the public with his terrible weather watcher's conundrum and that cringing 'Ta Ta, Be Good, Take care routine'. Like Simmons this presenters has destroyed the happiness of tens of thousands of lives over generations. Put him out to the shadow of the back stage where he and Simmons can bore the prop team to death. As for Paul Clarke, well I'm already in the throes of convulsing at this very moment just thinking about him! The man whose 'spiritual journey' brought him from Catholicism to Presbyterianism remains the darling boy of the entire 'Ulster is British', 'This is Our Wee Country' Unionist community and the vile and evil Orange Order who adore him and probably have pictures of him placed next to King Billy in their House of Orange HQ in east Belfast. Having achieved notoriety among the general Nationalist community in the North East and throughout Ireland for his annual 'adoration' broadcasts of the Twelfth of July Parades, UTV still refuses to sideline him. This man waxes lyrical every year about the wonderful lodges passing by on Dublin Rd on their way to the 'Field'. The 'wonderful 'Temperance Lodges, the wonderful 'charitable and fund raising Lodges' these great men and women of this 'fine up standing organization', models of benevolence,decency, morality, that one could proud off... He seems to have forgotten in his infamous praise and obvious euphoria and ecstasy at the mere sight of these morons that this is an avowedly anti Catholic organization, predicated on bigotry, hatred, religious intolerance, discrimination, triumphalism, violence and oppression of the north east's Catholic and Nationalist population. The terrifying years of Drumcree violence, Ardoyne stand offs, blockading roads, civil unrest, and bloodshed caused by this evil organisation all conveniently brushed under the carpet in his commentary and praise; usually concluding with how wonderful this evil parade is for 'the tourism industry'!. When are these people, finally after decades of tormenting the public, destroying our lives, our health, our sanity, finally going to be shunted away to the 'UTV past their sell by date Knacker's Yard for 3rd rate crushing bores!!

I'm fed up with the professional reviewers with standard 'watch out for this up and coming director', referencing them to another of their films, or these actors excel at blah blah. Let's cut to the chase. The film is more suited as a TV film than big screen, well overcooked with a very strong dose of 'trying too hard' approaches to filming a 'whodunnit' mystery. Daniel Craig assigned to pointlessly imitating a southern american accent for the sake of it, that offered nothing to his character or the film and made him look ridiculous and laughable. I was bored with this film and as usual the plethora of four and five stars plastered all over film reviews is laughable and only convinces me more than ever that these people must be being compelled to do this if they are to survive as film reviewers/critics and successfully mix and mingle and access opportunities in the industry. The 'you better play ball with us or else' dilemma - no advertising revenue for your newspaper, and no career opp's for you unless you say nice things and get people into the cinema. This routine run of the mill film - best estimate 3 healthy stars is passable for a couple of long hours with popcorn and fizzy drink but that's it - best left until it appears on TV screen next Christmas. Do not go out of your way to see it at the cinema for the earth won't be moving unless you make it by laughing hilariously at Daniel Craig's accent. Surely deserving an Oscar for best comedic accent performance!

I loved this movie so much that two weeks later I went and watched it again. Julianne Moore is superb at demonstrating the aspects of specifically middle aged life to do with unrequited love, romance, tragedy. It was funny, heart warming, tragic, and an interesting take on the realities and dilemmas of middle age. Superb and unmissable.

I agree with a comment from another reviewer. This is essentially a 'nothing much happens' film, missing an essential middle and simple trundles along to nowhere. Uninspiring, lifeless, dull and boring, avoid.

Every reviewer of this film is almost salivating, gorging on how wonderful a film they say it is. The audience scores appears remarkably different and it's they that make sense. After 1 hour and 10 minutes of this 1.30 hour movie, sheer utter drudgery that good acting couldn't save, I threw the towel in and left the cinema. This was that arty over the top secret 'fly on the wall' filming of scenes as though they're real life, in real time; the style of filming was mind numbingly boring, the single main explanation for why this film should be avoided like the plague. Swinton Byrne as Julie is frustratingly dull and carries an aura of blind innocence, naivety and utter stupidly about her, whilst Burke as Anthony carries around a face like a Lurgan spade, mumbling and blankly staring his way through a film that really felt like watching paint dry. I waited and waited to see if i could see what the 'enlightened, sophisticated, they know best' reviewers had seen; It never came. People around me began to leave and I finally followed suit. "Sumptuous class study", "Instant British classic.", "An understated, exquisite gem of a film." What??? It's precisely what these film reviewers are raving about that makes this film so bad. it may be alright for a load of film studies students studying the micro nuances of script, acting, directing and camera angles but for the average public looking for entertainment? No this is a film for a niche market of over indulgent cinematography connoisseurs and crushing bores who've checked out the Bluffer's Guide to Being a Film Buff and love using the expression at after the movie bar chat, "I adored this film, it just works on so many levels". I can't help but think when I read so many detailed reviews that they are almost competing with each other to see who appears more sophisticated, more 'arty', uses more little used adjectives and verbs and better turns of phrase that even I a well educated guy had to look up on line. They're over analysing the micro details of film making simply addressing another audience of 'themselves'. Avoid this mind numbingly bland boring film at all costs!

Just back from Cinema. Despite all the ranting and raving of how wonderful this film is I found it very disappointing. It's a very light hearted movie, not particularly funny at any time, that remains 'simmering' from start to finish, with no particular highs, or dramatic moments or finishes. A damp squid. I was happy it was over. One maybe two stars out of five for effort. Best avoided.