- 45 -

This trailer has catfished the lot of us. We expected a baddie but we've been had. We opened the door to fat bitch. 28 Years Later is a fucking trainwreck of a movie. The plot is awful and uninteresting, the editing is absolutely terrible, the soundtrack does NOT work, and the zombies are so fundamentally changed that they are no longer Rage Zombies. They're something completely different. What made 28 Days Later so special was the intelligent use of barren and trashy streets, outdated cameras, lack of characters, simple editing, and sparse use of soundtracks to create a truly lonely and isolating experience. The cast was excellent, the characters human and likeable, the final fight intelligent and captivating. 28 Years Later has the excellent cast but falls short everywhere else. The camera and set look too clean, giving the movie a sanitized look that doesn't fit. The editing is so awful that it actively brings you out of the movie. The soundtrack paired alongside old clips from movies and historical footage make for a distracting, and off-putting experience. The world feels populated, which it is, but too much so. That isolating feeling from the first movie is nowhere to be found here AT ALL. Even when out in the woods. The characters were portrayed excellently. The plot on the other hand is not. Midway through the movie, the dad goes from somewhat stoic psychotic into an abusive asshole for one scene that kicks off another journey after having just left the woods. This journey is far more tedious and although the mother and son shine here, everything else works very hard to make sure that you don't dwell on that. The ending is a slap on the face. All that watching and waiting and you're rewarded with a joke. This franchise has lost its identity within three movies. Danny Boyle and Alex Garland no longer remember what 28 Days Later is. They just know that it's zombies and violence. Truly sad.

A claustrophobic masterpiece. Das Boot is the greatest anti-war film that I've ever watched. It humanizes one of the most infamous armies in history, puts us on their level, and makes us watch as their morale drops. Makes us watch as the water starts seeping in. Subjects us to being helpless bystanders as we watch these men try to change their fate. I watched the Director's Cut personally and the pacing was perfect. Every minute was dedicated to driving the plot forward, no matter how seemingly menial. The cast is amazing and it's quite easy to get attached to everyone. The score is splendiferous and my favorite song (Konvoi) has an almost physical feeling of duty and imperviousness to it. But when used later I'm the movie, it feels more triumphant and steadfast. This movie left me in awe of what I just watched. In awe of the fact that I actually grew attached to the cast. In awe of what Wolfgang Peterson did. In awe of how the ending ripped everything away. Please watch this movie. It's one of the greatest of all time.

Unabashedly awful. Boldly embarrassing. Unwilling to even attempt to make something of itself. This movie had so many opportunities to be interesting. To make something of itself. Instead, it failed at every opportunity. There's not a single human being in this movie. No one in this movie gives a good performance. The entire cast is stilted and robotic, the plot is uninteresting, poorly thought out, and just straight up bad. The camera people are the only folks that showed up to play ball. Everyone else just left them at the stadium and went down to the Chili's down the street to get some grub. The "twists" make no sense, have no impact, and are utterly inconsequential. It's a mind-numbing disasterpiece that clearly demonstrates how bad some parts of horror have gotten over the years. Reeks of a first draft script. If you wanna watch a movie where a peculiar protagonist with a good heart takes out the head of an organization with flashbacks that actually add to the plot, watch Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes.

A thoroughly exhausting movie. Call it "experimental" or "arthouse" all you like. There's nothing artful about this. It's a heavy-handed film that relies on nothing but shock value. I'd give it a zero if I could.

If I could give it 0 stars, I would. I'll probably be the first to say publically that Emilia Perez is one of the most appalling pieces of abysmal dogshit that I've had the displeasure of watching. I watched this with a homie to split the load and my god do you need multiple people to watch this piece of shit with because you will lose your mind within 10 minutes otherwise. We couldn't even finish it due to how bad it was. The story, while original-ish is executed so poorly that it makes To Kill With Intrigue a masterclass of storytelling in comparison. Characters are introduced and you feel no connection to them due to how hamfisted they went about it. This movie is gender dysphoria because it has no idea what it wants to be. Is it a redemption movie? Is it an LGBTQ movie? Is it a cartel thriller? Is it a provocative piece that dives into the feeling of guilt? All of those questions can be answered with a resounding NO. The music is absolutely abysmal in every way, shape, and form. The songs often start so abruptly that when they eventually start "singing", you're left throwing your hands up in the air, confused as to when it started. And while we're on the topic of the "singing", let it be known that everyone here save for the children and one man during the Mother and Child song are about as lifeless as a soggy pool noodle. There's no charisma, no talent, and no attempt to actually make music. They just orate over a shitty instrumental. And as for the lyrics, Camille is going straight to hell for writing them. They're all awful and so on the nose that your face will cave in from all of the pressure. And last but certainly not least, let's talk about the undertones! How fun! I don't know what the hell this movie was trying to tell me. Man bad? Redemption through transitioning? I don't know and neither do anyone of the chimps that worked on this thing. Almost everything it does reeks of ignorance and is done in bad taste. Don't be fooled by the cinematography and set dressing (aka the only folks that's showed up). Emilia Perez is a celebration of the degregation of film quality and a telling view into who the cast of the movie really are. Talentless hacks. To quote that one Cardinals coach; "They are who we thought they were.