Drew Munson

Way, way worse than the previous couple entries. Total bore. 0 good scenes, 0 good actors, 0 good lines of dialogue. There's no suspense whatsoever. The characters are all so generic and forgettable. The plot is inconsistent with the rest of the series. When the bad guy enters the scene, do you expect everyone to run away frantically, or do you expect everyone to pull out guns and start shooting? If this was a western, you might expect the latter... but this is a horror movie so you shouldn't expect that - but that's what you get here. Other reviews are SHOCKING me with their 5 star lies, that's all you can call them. They're trolling or something. Others talking about the "gore" is making me wonder if I watched an edited version or something. I legitimately don't even remember any blood, definitely no guts or severed limbs/heads/eyeballs. In one scene, some character never before seen gives a whole lot of new info about Jason. How did he know any of this? No explanation. He wouldn't give the info up for free though, one of the characters had to allow this guy to break all his fingers before he'd give up the info. Why? No reason. Just, "you want the information? it's not free, give me your hand," after which he breaks the guy's fingers before telling him the dumbest shit you've ever heard AND THEN REPEATS THE PROCESS 2 MORE TIMES. That's actually one of the best and most memorable scenes btw, and it sucked. The hand is broken offscreen of course. Every kill seems offscreen btw, even the ones that aren't, and not in a sophisticated Hitchcock sort of way, but more of a "we don't have the budget" kind of way. I don't even care, I just know others might make the decision not to watch it based on this and if I can get 1 person to avoid this movie I'll be happy. They randomly tied The Evil Dead and Nightmare on Elm Street movies into this, also for no reason and to extremely poor effect. You'd think the writers were on some special drugs to come up with such random bad ideas, but if they were, the movie would be surprisingly stale considering that. Better than The Howling 7, Puppet Master 8, or Children of the Corn 7 though IIRC. Worst F13 by a lot. You know what a perfect comparison might be? The 6th Halloween movie, the Curse of Michael Myers. Not the producer's cut though - I heard that's actually decent. If you thought the "lore" they added to Michael Myers was a good idea in that one, you'll probably like this garbage.

The bar for the 3rd entry in a horror franchise is incredibly low. This movie's better than the 3rd entry of Friday the 13th or Nightmare on Elm Street or Child's Play or Halloween (counting Halloween 4 as the 3rd one here obviously) or Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Scream or Saw or Puppet Master or Hellraiser or The Howling or Alien or Children of the Corn or even Evil Dead, which are the only ones coming to mind right now. I'd actually say it's the best sequel to a horror movie I've ever seen, POSSIBLY except for Evil Dead 2 or Aliens (which was more of an action/sci-fi honestly so while it might be a better MOVIE, it's not a better horror movie). Terrifier 3 isn't a great movie in general, but for a horror sequel, it's simply the best there is and needs to be graded on this curve. It's not like anyone will be comparing this to The Godfather any time soon. How to know if you'll like this movie: If you liked Terrifier 2, you'll like this one unless you simply have a thing where you can't watch a movie if kids get killed or if animals are used. If you like hilarious, unreal levels of gore as seen in The Thing, Dead Alive, Re-Animator, you'll like this. It's hilarious and cartoonishly over the top in its violence. I saw discussions where people were arguing over what part of this movie was the hardest to watch and it seemed as though AT LEAST 5 scenes were competing. Catch it in theaters before it's too late and don't spoil anything for yourself. Just expect a direct sequel with the same surviving characters from Terrifier 2. I'll be watching it again in theaters soon. It's not a standalone movie, you really need to be familiar with the events of part 2, including the post-credits scene, so it's best to watch Terrifier 2 within a day before going to see this one, but it's a perfect movie for Halloween and extremely fun! (Just leave the kids at home for this one)

If you judge a movie based on dialogue, plot, acting, cinematography, you know, REAL metrics, you're going to hate it. The positive reviews for this movie are written by those who judge movies based on the following: gore, sex, scariness. Morons, basically. I'm not making that up either, I actually saw reviews where the first thing they wrote is "Kills X/5, sex Y/5, scare factor Z/5." This movie sucked so badly I felt the need to verbally abuse its fans in retribution for wasting my time. PM2 isn't even 1% of the movie that the first is. Unwatchable garbage. Even those who only watch for gore and nudity would do better to watch porn or ANY OTHER horror movie.

As usual, completely misunderstood by every single person and I have to be the first to explain it. It's about a strict religious mom. No windows/doors = sheltered from the world, homeschooled. Toys like snakes disappearing, yeah, the mom is taking those away in her crazy episodes in which she's convinced that Satan is trying to get to her children. "If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out," = crazy, actual jesus quote. Not all christians kill their kids, but when someone does kill their own kid, it's a crazy jesus nut. BTW, I hope you enjoy "scenes" in which the only thing in the shot is a lamp that's off-center at a random angle b/c you'll be begging to watch paint dry by the ACTUAL 50TH "SHOT" OF THAT. Seriously, over 50 shots of that, no exaggeration. Oh, and christians? You worship a god who contradicts himself on the first page (genesis 1:20 and 2:19). A god with different laws for different days of the week. You worship a god who killed everyone in the world, yet claim that Satan is evil. You're stupid and fucking crazy, keep your retarded mouths shut. Every anti-vaxer believes in the same god. Every single flat earther sides with you on this one. Scientists are much less likely to be one of you. Because the smarter you are, clearly, the less likely you are to be christian and the dumber you are, the more likely you are to be christian. Have a great day, morons. Try to understand the next movie you watch without my help. LOL, yeah fucking right. Literally, not a single one of you got it AGAIN.... I hate you all so very much.

Some questions for those who gave this movie 5 stars: 1) How many more scenes of destroying vegetables to record the sound effect do you believe this movie needed? 2) How many more times do you believe we needed to watch someone scream inside of a booth in order to record the sound for an unseen movie? 3) What was the most terrifying scene in this horror movie? 4) When do you plan on rewatching this movie? At some point during your life, surely? Challenges for those who gave this movie 5 stars: 1) Quote the movie, go on. One quote. 2) Name the protagonist. 3) Name the antagonist. 4) List the sequence of events without making the movie sound like a "making-of" documentary for a generic movie that doesn't exist. And by "making-of" doc, of course I only mean "making-the-sound-of." 5) Admit that you were wrong, that the movie's forgettable, apologize, and edit your review. Thanks.