niall shaw

A brilliant, original, dazzling story that hits its foot to the gas and never lets up. It is a visual wonder, with eye popping cinematography, blown out colours and extreme closeups. Colin Farrel is perfectly cast as Lord Doyle, strung out and in the hole in his last legs. His redemption arc is incredibly well patterned and anchors the chaos in a breathless humanity. Don’t sleep on this film, well worth a watch.

Wow, where to start on how unnecessary this film was. I always felt like the John Wick films were passibly good. The first one was enough to get the gist of it. Then they ran it into the ground. IN this case, why does this film exist? Keanu wanted John Wick to be finished, so they killed off his character in the last film, but he reappears here. And like the premise of every other John Wick film, it is a revenge quest with choregraphed fights. At some point suspension of disbelief reaches its limits. Anna De Armas is about believably tough and ready to fight as a six year old boxing his/her dad. He solution, grunt through every move, huff through every dive, squawk through every bit of insane choreographed move. Silly, yes, over the top, yes, so were all the John Wick films. But at least Keanu was that part. Armas is nowhere near as charming or believeable. The scenes where she jumps on peoples backs and attempts to flip them are totally hilarious because she is all of 98 lbs soaking wet and it looks like she is being given a piggy back ride. The film has to center on her and she was simply the wrong choice of many wrong choices they make in this film. Like the grenades scene, where explosions harm everyoine within a five mile radius except her or the flamethrower scenes where there is a nuclear level fireball shooting out of flamethrower, but she is able to battle it out with the baddie with a firehouse? Just stupid, mindless, pointless and above all, cringe inducing. Avoid at all costs.

If you like to watch paint peel, stare at the walls for hours on end and pick your scalp looking for bits, then this film is perfect for you. Every thirty seconds of this dreadful, excruciating, film there is a loud bang, just in case you fall asleep of total and complete boredom. This is as awful as a film could EVER BE.

It is boring, meandering, pointless and stupid. Which is exactly, ironically, what Mr. Bean was for years. But there was a hidden subterfuge to it all. We were in on the joke with Mr. Bean and we knew that it was all supposed to be what it was. If this was Man Vs. Bean, it might have worked, but there was simply no point to having other caricatures of actors in it. Everyone from the well meaning Police constable to the lame burglars, to the snobby fraudster in the uber rich house, the entitled wife who only cares about her guide book and her silly dog, there is no point to any of them speaking. Which is where the mistake was made, this was all a slapstick exercise. It was classic Rowan Atkinson, he is an incredibly gifted physical comic. He knows how to mug for laughs, he knows how to entertain everyone in this manner. Taken for what this "series" is, it is a live action bug bunny cartoon, a man "home alone" with a computer generated bee. One could forgive all of that, if there wasn't any dialogue, it would have worked. What gives this 1 star is that every time, aside from Rowan Atkinson speaking, we already know what they are going to say, we already know the ending, it is literally told to us in a flashback in the first five minutes of the first episode. So why drawn it out, why torture everyone with the pointless exercise of pretending this is a new character with a new thing? Really disappointing and really pointless. Watch it with the sound off, you may enjoy it more. Just a terrible waste of time.

Absolutely terrible film start to finish. Ridley Scott, great director. Good actors in other films. Check. BUT playing dress up for two hours while everyone tries and fails at an Italian accent is THE WORST. Jared Leto absolutely could star ina one man show about chef Boyardee. Not in a good way. There was no story. Only scenes where the actors played high school dress up. Absolutely terrible. And as a bonus, the worst line ever uttered in cinematic history, “father, son, house of Gucci.” The major actors in this film should have read the script and realized what a hot mess it was. Final word. Lady Gaga was the WORST part. She played every line she learned her accent from Luigi from the simpsons. “Atsa not a spicy meatball”.