crazy chicken

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This is definitive, this is a 5 star. One day while I was fighting in a store for toilet paper in 1958, I saw this weird light coming from the sky. Then I passed out and had quite the dream. In my glorious vision I saw myself jumping off of a bridge, holding something shiny. How ignorant of me to not follow these instructions immediately! After passing out 14 times on the toilet of the store with many bruises since the toilet paper business man got many free hits since I passed out 14 times, I decided to finally do what fate told me to do. I climbed up to the bathroom window and grabbed the light. I then jumped off of the bridge that was over the sewage. Luckily for me I picked the right bridge, and since there was no light, the shininess stopped and I could see what I was holding. It was the MLA handbook! The hero, the master, the king, the queen, the hand! It saved my life from hitting the pee water since it teleported me to the oil reservoir, 60 years into the future. I was sticky with oil where I found some other people in the oil lake, all passed out. They all woke up all of a sudden, all having weird clothes from the past and holding the MLA hand. I was the chosen one since I had a hand and a book, and I was to be their guide and ambassador to the outside world. I now live in a mansion on top of mount' Everst with 68 wives, 3 butlers, and 419 maids. In the beginning I forced them all into the warehouse to recite the MLA hand book until they weep tears of oil, where I shall sell that to the black market. The MLA hand book is not a way of writing, it is the way of life. I have been getting visits from the MLA hand book monsters from the MLA dimension, where they torture me until I make someone join the MLA hand book beliefs. Thus is the way of the MLA hand book chosen one. You want to know how to make a MLA hand book now don't you? First you get a maniquen hand and take it apart, then get a empty book and put it in the smoothie maker. Cook the hand you cut into small pieces and the book that is now a liquid and you will get the MLA hand book. Now eat it. Make another one by writing "*escapidaous escapidaous escapidaous nos nos escapidaous ves wsth or <<< **** &&&&" YOU MUST NEVER EVER EVER write on that paper MLA HAND BOOK or else Earth will be doomed, since wishing for the book is highly suggestive of being poor and the MLA society don't like the rich. It clearly says that if the MLA society loves you the Earth will be destroyed, so make everyone hate you. Teachers if your reading don't force us to get a mla hand boook I hate ela i hate mla its all boring and dumb I can type the way i wnat and if you say otherwise you are a meddling meddler ok guys can we agree on that bye bye If you want to make a review like mines then first put one star then just say some outrageous and funny things and it will be funny okay say things like "I was 7 years old living on the farm when all of a sudden a red hole came into the planet and I was birthed into the mla society that lived on planet zenth. They then procedded to give me the pass out liquid and beat me up into a pulp. In fact I am using someone to transcribe my messages since I myself can't type or talk for the matter, I am in fact still a pulp until the mla society decide to give me a second chance. I have 4 husbands and 2222222222222222 butlers working for me as I have quite the cavern that must be taken care of by my butler army." feel free to edit and add on to both of my stories I did not get the mla handbook I don't know if it truly is bad or not but ok