Crow Abode – Google

That's 2 hours of my life I'll never get back. Wonka 2023 struggles so hard to be whimsical and charming that it comes across as tacky and forced. The character of Wonka himself is reduced from an iconic, somewhat mad genius, to a boring, generic "protagonist with a dream who people don't understand." As is the unfortunate case with a lot of modern films, iffy looking CGI is plastered all around, and it usually doesn't blend in too well with the practical effects and actors. The big "stop the big bad guy heist ending" was so ridiculous I was fighting to not burst out laughing during the "serious" scenes. Whereas the original feels like a deep dive in a new world, this film feels like a gasp of stale air that manages to last 2 hours. Wonka 2023 takes a beloved classic and twists it into a heavily unnecessary, unwanted origin story that tarnishes a well-known character, rather than building onto them. If someone managed to enjoy this film, I am happy for them, but this is not a movie I intend to revisit.

Easily Illumination's worst film, which is saying a lot for the studio that brought us- every other Illumination film. The minions were always mildly annoying, but with every new movie they become more intolerable. What I assume are meant to be emotional moments are laughably pathetic because the writing feels like it was stolen from a 2nd grader's book report. The lines from a lot of actors are rushed and feel very phoned-in, but, in all fairness, they're not given very much to work with. The scenes are scattered to form a crooked puzzle of a movie; some scenes are far too short, and plenty drag on far too long. Illumination is content with mediocrity; they are only concerned with grabbing a toddler's attention span for 90 minutes with as many loud = funny fart and burp jokes as they can cram into the screen time, so alcoholic mothers everywhere may have temporary respite. And it works, judging by the box office, so truly, who can blame them? They've found a very sweet spot where they put in minimum time, money, and effort, and out comes lucrative results. (Also, God bless the 5-star comments rambling about Minions: The Rise of Morbius; genuinely made my day)

I was really hesitant to rewatch this because my last impression of this film was that it was bad. It was a childhood favorite, and coming back to it, I can honestly see why. Is it a masterpiece? Honestly, yes. This film is unbelievably funny. I came in expecting to laugh at the president and nothing more, but was surprised to find decent humor sprinkled throughout. The president scene is one of the most legendary animated movie moments I've seen in recent time. There is humor for every demographic in this film, which is a rare but pleasant surprise for the average moviegoer. No jokes try too hard; the joke is delivered, you either laugh or you don't, and the movie goes on. There's no painful drags with the humor in this movie and I appreciate that dearly. The main quartet of characters play off of each other well, and their unique abilities and personalities are used often throughout the movie. I was worried that the main character, Susan, was going to be annoying and cowardly, but after discovering and embracing her newfound power, she turns out to be a badass. I also find her getting over her ex to be not as generic feeling as it generally would in a movie like this, and in fact it's a rather welcome message. I could see someone in need of a "getting over someone" theme taking something away from this movie. The designs are solid; I like the small details with the characters, like how one or two of the villain's 4 eyes will focus individually on a side task. It isn't much, but it provides something new to look at every time you rewatch the film. The backgrounds and scenery aren't bad either; I like the design of Galaxar's ship, and the Monster facility does a good job of contributing to the feeling of isolation, and helping you feel more for the protagonist.

Khumba is a remarkably average film. There's nothing I absolutely adore, but there's nothing I loathe, either. There's nothing groundbreaking to be found, but nothing offensive, either. There's a few things that I liked, and a few things I didn't. It's got a relatively well known cast, including Liam Neeson, Steve Buscemi, and Laurence Fishburne to name a few. For the most part, they do well. It's far from their best, but I can't really blame them. They're not exactly given riveting lines to deliver. Like the plot, the dialouge is nothing special and fairly predictable. The story is your run of the mill "protagonist is the outcast who's bullied for being different physically or mentally, who later gains the respect of his/her peers at the end of the movie after embarking on a wacky adventure of some sort alongside a few buddies." The villain, Phango, feels like a Scar/Shere Khan hybrid, softened up a bit. I do applaud the film for showing him getting his revenge on his pack on screen. Very few kids movies nowadays seem to have the courage to do such things. But the PrOpHeCy nonsense comes out of nowhere, and seems like a cheap excuse to make Khumba special. The side characters, for the most part, are forgettable. I forgot the names of basically everyone besides the main trio, and even then I'm not a fan of all of them. Now, one thing I can say thankfully is that no one reaches Olaf or Minion levels of annoying. The Impalas came a bit close during the fence scene, but did not exceed my patience. The only character who started to bug me was Bradley; I was genuinely afraid he was going to have a full musical number, which thankfully did not happen. He's a bit too dramatic for me, and aside from 1 pee joke from a meerkat kid, he's responsible for most of the other bodily fluid/gas humor in this movie. I just didn't like him, and felt that Khumba and Mama V could've had much better bonding if he wasn't in the picture. That's another let down this film caused; Mama V has a tragic past about losing her son, and Khumba loses his mother in the film. That is SUCH a perfect setup, but the movie almost completely throws that storyline away when it's brought up. It's honestly disrespectful to Mama V, because aside from Khumba's father and friend, she was the one side character I actually somewhat cared about, and was interested in. For a movie with a budget of only 20 million, the visuals are solid. As previously stated, there's nothing magnificent, but nothing that's necessarily bad. I have seen bad. Trolland is bad. Pets 2 is bad. (not Secret Life of Pets 2, Pets 2) I actually like the designs of the zebras and other creatures very much, and the backgrounds have a wide variety. It's a pretty film to look at. For the most part, the animation is fine. It does its job without looking lifeless or lazy, though some of the movements get stiff, especially during action/running scenes. Another thing that can make the movie awkward on occasion is the editing. It has its rough moments. Some scenes are cut off way too fast, throwing away all suspense or audience involvement, and some go on a bit too long. This movie is fine. Would I watch it again? Probably not, at least not for quite some time. There's nothing in it that I can relate to, and nothing I'm dying to revisit. I do recommend it, especially if you have kids, and especially if they're struggling with feeling different. If you're interested, it's currently free on YouTube at the time I'm posting this review.