maggie u

As someone who works directly with domestic violence and sexual assault survivors, I found The Will to Change deeply problematic. bell hooks’ approach lacks the on-the-ground professional lens and trauma-informed care that’s essential in this work. The book leans into victim-blaming, places too much emotional labor on women and survivors, lacks the empowerment and autonomy models and makes sweeping overgeneralizations about parenting and relationships. It spreads harmful misinformation about how abuse truly works. For those seeking nuanced, trauma-informed perspectives, this book misses the mark in crucial ways. There is some value to read it but be very careful and discerning. There’s a lot of blindspots. Read Why Does He Do That? By Lundy Bancroft instead and go specifically to the myths and misconceptions about abuse and go to A Call To Men for a path to healthy masculinity.

It had a lot of problematic things that were written that were not trauma-informed, pretty capitalist/grind culture mindset, not mental health grounded… be careful reading this book. Have a discerning eye because she asserts things that she really doesn’t have much if any professional knowledge about.