This “fussiness” or the anxiety of southern women and their daughters in law and relatives to “fuss” over decor, dinners and other social engagements lives on, at least during my observations in the 1990s and 2000s. I have never understood why. The solution of finding a solution (gentleman caller) unto the issue of marriage is met with yet another “problem” about how he should be received by the household: this problem , solved, then, introduced by another problem of dinner, is the very irritation of the time period and subculture. There is never a soothing (solution) of this anxiety for the southern “fuss.” If you ever do have an issue with an encounter of these types, be armed with a method to keep them busy using a distraction, or else you will be the subject picked apart in appearance, personality, family background, career or else anything. My personal favorite tactic is to make use of a giant lie to cocoon my inner self away from the front lines. Left field nonsensical retort also works. Feels like an onslaught of a bad critique from the NYT with a southern accent, but it’s ENDLESS. Good job Tennessee Williams, southern fickleness, and from me: how to escape the verbal abuse grinding of very finicky people