Solrob Tetrohedron

This is the worst movie ever made. I do not understand how you could possibly give this anything above a zero without being even dumber than all the characters in this godawful "film". Anyone who tells you they are a science fiction fan and that they liked this movie is a drooling moron who has probably only seen Star Wars and thinks that ChatGPT is sentient. This was so bad I'm going to stop watching movies for several weeks at least, and even then I don't think it'll ever be the same. If you think this was good you're the kind of sucker TV commercials are made for and you should find yourself a wrangler to stop yourself from running with scissors. The Room was more emotional, 1 out of 5 stars.

I've seen empty Garry's Mod maps with more actual horror than this movie. The massive number of fake outs made me remember consuming three pounds of sawdust favorably, and that was interesting and exciting by comparison. I'm pretty sure there are AI generated scripts with more consistency and fewer plot holes than this loosely connected pile of storylines which feels more like an anthology with no common theme or transition between each short than a script thats actually supposed to make any kind of sense. Obviously everyone who gave this a one star doesn't understand that the father was the killer and the call was coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE!!! The actors weren't too bad i guess and I hope we get to see Chris' Sonic the Hedgehog fan comics in the sequel. 4/10 not enough hot water because the basement serial killer spent a week turning it off before deciding that the movie should have something actually happen.

This movie would have been better with liberal use of a slide whistle and other cartoon sound effects. 5/5 not enough water

Maybe it's because this is the first movie I've watched, but I thought it was decent. Everyone seems to think that it makes no sense but I understood it perfectly. Obviously the scene with the underwater chains was supposed to convey that the girl was a vampire, the inventor was Nelson Mandella, and the entire film was a very artistic representation of late stage capitalism. I only took a star off because that one guy who looks like the Chad meme just kinda died and stuff it wasn't very clear. Anyways, it's obvious that the tea was dry ice and the entire film was a near-death hallucination induced by the hypothermia caused by ingesting it. 4/5 stars, not enough water.