Jake Sluder

Congratulations! Movie producers have finally topped the awfulness that was Jurassic Park III. Not only do the main characters from the original trilogy show up for a blatant cash grab cameo and add nothing to the depth of the movie, but the empty action sequences made the movie simply unbearable. (Spoiler alert) The writers literally couldn't put their brains together to come up with anything useable concerning dinosaurs living amoungst humans to where they had to BS the substance of their plot by having an evil corporation manufacture giant locadases to basically control what crops are grown (which by the way makes 0 sense if they can manufacture giant pests than why not make a profit producing giant crops OR eat the darn dinasour meat provided). It's not like giant corporations being evil hasn't been done in literally 4 other Jurassic movies, right? It is disappointing how far this franchise has fallen from grace, and aside from the bad writing, Spielberg would be rolling over in his grave seeing how his work has been manipulated to make a profit by generalizing it to a broad audience so parents can show their children. GIVE ME A BREAK. Not only does this ironically conflict with message that greed corrupts people, but it goes against everything that directors of his time stood for. Why parents of this generation want to shield their children from the darkness and gore of the world art yet let them watch sexualized music videos on a regular basis is beyond me. If you don't understand what I'm referring to in past media just watch poltergeist for God's sake. It literally has someone's face practically peal off and the movie was rated PG! Hopefully our generation of artists can start to bring up original subject material so Hollywood can stop with these terrible reboots that undermined the original work that went into creating new ideas. By the way (no offense to the actor personally because everyone does their job mainly for money), but I hate the fact that whenever we, as an audience, are presented with a certain male figure that shall remain nameless we're constantly reminded why his character is amazing and cool during the entire freaking movie he's in! We get it! He's the relatable protagonist we should support, now can we move on with the actual plot?! The saddest part (besides me spending actual money to see this) is that the arcalogist couple didn't marry each other. This is honestly the main reason I wanted to see this because in Jurassic Park III, Ellie had to have been married to someone else so Alan had someone to call for help when he was on the island. It was very dissatisfying for my younger self and a large part mewanted this desperately to be resolved with good writing, but I should've known that this shameless cash grab of a sequel long after the peak of it's franchise would never deliver such a basic pleasure. I'm not even going to mention the moody clone plot that reduced to a whiny teenage girl, the sudden black market development that made absolutely no sense, or the fact that they had ridiculous Lazer guided dinasours. Just don't waste your time with this.

I genuinely was shocked at every twist. The atmosphere of classic and unique horror environments (abandoned barn, hospital, parking garage, etc.) really adds to the unnerving aestic making things all the more thrilling and adding to the self-awarness of the metextulaziation of slasher genre. The movie itself is also (like it's predessor) a stand alone that is well deserving of a watch by anyone, yet for long time horror fans, the self-exspansive commentary on horror tropes from the brilliant mind of Wes Craven truly helps make this movie stand out; not to mention the riveting performances given by the Scream trio of returning characters as well as supporting roles. I loved growing up with this franchise and can't wait to see more worthy equals like this to continue on Wes' work, and as well as continue the narrative of the relatable fictional characters brought to life by some of the strongest actors in Hollywood history.

A funny movie with an honestly powerful message of self-independence. The humor is unexplainably funny at times and is great for smart and dumb people alike. Seeing how the conflict between individualism and beauty standard stereotypes is becoming prominent, this movie appears to be becoming a modern American classic. I won't spoil anything in this movie, but yes, there may be some cheese and predictability to it (but it's worth the watch). Fair warning, there are one or two oddly dark moments that are slightly concerning and out of place and slightly homophobic caricatures. These things aren't prominent and don't ruin entire scenes, however.

The atmosphere of the film is dreadful by being focused on a son taking care of his mother with dementia. It was painfully accurate on how the disease was portrayed and how it can strain a child's relationship with their parents by having to put their life on hold to take care of them. The movie will definitely leave you disturbed, but the fictional liberties of a vhs tape being the main cause of the son's madness honestly just takes away from the realliness of the issues portrayed and (to a degree) trivializes them. It is interesting how (like the disease of demintia), the environment itself doesn't know what time period it's in seeing that their the anachronistic placement of paper credit cards and VHS tapes and the juxtaposed modern idea of online dating. It truly takes it's artistic liberties in showcasing the isolation of the protagonist, which was occasionally a tad bit annoying due to his quirks as a character. Overall, the movie achieved it's thrills through using disturbing themes in mostly good taste despite a few minor flaws.

Wes Craven would be proud. The main characters see more development than arguably any of the other scream sequels and the new metatextualization of modern horror (specifically reboots) is not only genius, but at certain points downright hilarious. I'm not going to spoil who exactly gets killed, but I feel that it was a bit emotional seeing these character survive so long only to have one give up to a trope that was evident as long ago as the 1st scream. You know the person is dead long before it actually happens and with the infamouse words "I'll be right back" sealing their fate indefinitely. The movie isn't perfect, but as far as being a fun and gory slasher it certainly meets the mark. I feel that some scenes could've been a bit more original and not borrow as much from the original films. (Yes, I know this film is also supposed to act as a direct sequel, but there is a difference between the natural flow of chronological events versus completely rehashing things that we've already seen as an audience.) That isn't to say I didn't enjoy the opening act of the movie. It reinacts the stocker type facade of ghostface and once again pokes fun at horror movies using outdated technology. It also tied itself to the plot in a very affective way. There are also genially fun moments like how the movie trolls the audience of a jump scare as Wes (a name of a character that references the horror legend himself, Wes Craven) movies around his house alone. The scene would go on to even include a Psycho reference which was amazing in every aspect. This movie in short, provides you with a thrilling and comedic experience that is well balanced and does it's original subject matter justice. Also it helps that I loved the return of the original cast and (despite them having little to do with the plot itself) how strong their performances were. It felt peotic in a sense that an older generation of horror was leading a new generation along the plot. It was as if the horror genre is finally reconnecting to its roots.

It's a classic body horror movie with a meaningful social commentary message on socioeconomics (specifically how the rich treat the poor after generations of privilege). This historical movie takes place before cgi took over special effects and it shows in the best way possible. The practical effects will truly send chills down your spine! The acting is also exquisite. You can truly feel the desperation of the people trying to escape the oddly sexualized cult of aristocrats. My only concern for the movie is how it displays a mentally handicapped individual as one of the monsters (see the large mother), but it works well with the plot seeing that many of the aristocrats of the society are implied to be imbreeds.

A fun psychedelic trip reminesent of late 70s and 80s movies in this early 2000s film. More films should learn from the surrealism aspect of not giving the audience an abundance of unnecessary details. Beyond the black rainbow gives you the characters, their motives, and the setting in a simplistic style that allows the surreal atmosphere of the world to take over through a jubilance of contrasting colors and sounds. As if you were on acid, it numbs your senses periodically which intensifies shocking moments like an unheard of genre of unique thrillers. Truly an underated classic.