Kel Valdoria

Pure plot armor. Almost everything was made up science. Not fantasy science. Stuff like known science that the director just pretended everyone didn't understand how it worked. The acting was good, but characters were incredibly dislikable. Some graphics were great, while others were lazy and terrible. At the end of the day, I was halfway theough the mo ie and i waz just wishing the movie would end. The nature of super hero movies are entertaining, and it had some entertaining elements. But throw millions I to any superhero movie and you'll be hard pressed to find a movie that doesn't entertain slightly. Terrible all around and a major dissapointment, even with the 1960s vibes it had going for it.

It has funny moments, but the daughter is a complete a-hole. Her boyfriend is a disrespectful man-child who single-handedly sabotaged the family and inclined her to make terrible life decisions so she can leach off of him. Everyone but the father seems to see this, and yet the whole movie is trying to paint it as if the father is over-reacting. It was hard to watch this with such a hated characters being portrayed as the good characters.

A masterpiece that borders on surpassing the original. Between some of the best actor performances I've seen (across multiple characters), the mis en scene, the cinematography, costume design, pacing and plot development....beyond stunning. One thing I've noticed are people's negative reviews. They all seem to stem from the fact that this horror is Nosferatu and not some fast-paced jump-scare amalgamation of action. I have a plethora of words to describe the idiotic negative reviews, but to sum it up, people watched a movie they clearly knew nothing about and then decided to complain about it. Nosferatu is NOT Dracula. It isn't a fast-paced vampire action movie. The original Nosferatu was always a slow, seductive despair that edges into people's souls like a shadow of a castle slowly overlaps a village as the sun moves through the sky (I use that imagery with purpose for those who have seen the movie). Not only is the story true to previous Nosferatu's and even a few Dracula interpretations that play on Nosferatu, but it was able to capture the original spirit of Nosferatu in a way that is true to the past, yet flavorful for the present. People who expect fast-action paced horrors because they have the attention spans of amoebas should not be allowed to review movies pricelessly because anything they like, is most certainly, a bad movie with. For people who actually enjoy good movies, this is a must-watch for your repertoire. For people who are only entertained by TikTok videos and action movies...this is not for you. If you do deign to watch it, try not to sully the image of a great movie with the false equivalent of an understanding review.

It pains my heart to rate this so low, but the film is a mess. I wanted to to succeed if for no other reason than because I love the artistry behind the movie. It reminds me of a mixture of Gormenghast, City of Ember, Dark City, Caligula and a flurry of niche cult classic films with unique artistic portrayals. But, almost everything but the artistic direction went wrong with this film. Between the plot writing, pacing (though they gave it a very good and possibly the best they could have done with how much material they tried to present), dialogue, acting (though a few notable characters like Shia LaBeouf), plot writing, etc. Understandably, the plot may have meant to be purposefully vacuous at times, as I think the movie was merely trying to present a simple thematic through an artistic lens, and the plot was almost like a necessary component the director thought would drag it down. But the message in of itself was incredibly flawed. To summarize: -Artistry was fantastic, though it aggravated many other elements necessary for cohesive storytelling -It seems like a philosophically flawed film, whether you agree with the root ideologies presented or not -I could have watched the first 10 minutes, left, and come back for the last 10 minutes, and have fundamentally understood the movie -Fellini did a better job with his movies, which should be a wake-up-call since he is known for his porn and exposition, not his plot -Certain parts of the film were symbolically lazy and ham-fisted, which were probably needs for plot-armor to fix the narrative that was attempted to be presented as artistic interpretation, though it fell flat given the general aesthetic of the movie

Both a classic, but also incredibly well done. Retold is really bringing it back, but it was insanely fun with tons of replayability even before retold. Simply put, this is a must for your arsenal if you are an RTS fan.

High production value mired in poor and janky acting by some of the major cast as well as mediocre storytelling and dialogue (which is normally okay, but pretty disappointing for what was meant to be a high quality show). A few cast members do sell the show, though I don't think they can keep it afloat from the likes of Bordizzo, Inosanto and Winstead who are incredibly beautiful, and incredibly bad at acting. A high school thespian would do a better job than that lot, though Dawson, Hati and Skoll somewhat remedy their poor acting. The writing is just as amateurish. Dialogue that generally lazy, but not exactly bad. An example (Spoiler) is when Winstead (actress) is talking to an administrator and wants to inspect their storage. The admin gives off this casual indifference saying they are busy and that this major issue, which has him talking directly to a high ranking general, is less important than whatever day to day activities he has going on. Winstead casually mentions that they'd have to do a more formal inspection then (who saw that coming) and the admin completely changes his tune and shows them around. I expect this calibre of writing from young adult or child writers - incredibly easy to forsee where its going and its only useful to further the plot. However...most of the writing is like this. So really, there writing furthers plot in a basic and relatively lazy way, but neglects all the hallmarks of good writing when presented with the opportunities to write well. This is fine for a low budget run of the mill kids show, but reflects poorly on a high budget flagship show like this.

It was one of the worst movies I've ever seen, and that's incredible! Simply put, the ONLY redeeming facet to this movie would be the special effects. Everything with this movie was wrong. 1. I love most of the actors, but the key actors just didn't do a good job acting within the plot (character decisions were also done poorly when paired with the acting for it). I think this came down to the type of comedy it was....Gor is a dark character with a dark history, and making a movie revolving around him with every bit of it being childish humor....it was a poor decision. 2. The story writing sucked. Character decisions, plot armor, and the usual, but the actual dialogue was poor, which I consider to be rare when it comes to Marvel movies. The dialogue is usually so well done, but this movie went in the opposite direction. 3. The movie focused far too much on irrelevant tidbits and adventures and not enough on the actual plot....which is bizarre to say the least. I would say that the worst thing about this movie is that it took a potentially great villain and story and made it so that way canon will never do Gor justice.

When I saw the critic reviews I thought...naaaahhh....but yea, it is TERRIBLE! Contrived, terrible dialogue, one-dimensional characters, poor fights and a story plot that didn't really make sense and was held together by thick goblets of plot armor. I don't understand how they could mess up a movie about a vampire in a superhero universe, but they failed in almost everything! If you like inane fights and have a pea brain, I suspect you'll appreciate the movie. Otherwise, I would strongly advise not to waste your time with this.

The most shocking thing about this show are the amount of 5 star ratings it has. Don't get me wrong, it has a very STRONG production quality which is embellished with strong acting. But the reason it gets 2 stars is because it fails in THE most important part of a show...its writing. It has TERRIBLE writing. The dialogue is actually relatively good, but the characters, stories and plots are absolute drivel. Essentially, each character is the same, each with different personalities, but all effectively mad (which detracts from all of them). None of the characters are particularly likeable, plots seem to resolve with heavy plot armor and characters are constantly making decisions out of character. One episode a character is kind and endearing, the next the character is a bloodthirsty malevolent killer who lives only for blood and agony....like what? The story seems to be written by someone with ADHD because the story can't seem to make up its mind on the directions it wants to take. It'll build something up only for it to fizzle out into a completely differen't turn which makes no coherant sense to the story plot. It wraps up in plot armor and then focuses on character grandstanding which, again, tends to make little sense in the scenes. I would argue that, if the production quality wasn't so good, that this would be 1 star and one of the worst professionally done shows I've encountered so far (and I've seen MANY terrible shows). It became cringe very fast, and I had to suffer through the rest just to give this a fair appraisal...not worth a watch!!

I don't know what is more bizarre, the unappetizing and cheap nature of this show or the people that enjoy this drivel.