Henry G

I don't know what the people who reviewed Sonic the Hedgehog POSITIVELY were on, but I wish I was provided with an overdose of it before sitting down. And the optional horseblinders and earplugs that they were given. This isn't a movie. It's a string of pop culture references strung together in a trenchcoat with the IP name of Sonic slapped on top. Don't be fooled by the name; It's not a Sonic movie. It's a movie about a middle aged cop and his girlfriend? Fiance? Wife? Who stumble onto a mysterious alien and for (no good reason that any normal human being would take) put themselves in immediate danger to try and keep him out of the hands of scawy "government officials" who want to do ... scary stuff.. to him. Probably. Characters don't talk to each other, writing inconsistencies abound, the stilted acting and weird casting choices for what's ostensibly supposed to be a kids' movie rob it of any relatability it might've had. It doesn't even manage to cash in on nostalgia, because it completely ignores the IP it's built on. I'm a casual Sonic fan, and this movie reads to me like it was made by people who were ashamed they were even touching the series with a yardstick. I had almost no expectations and still managed to be disappointed. Don't waste your money or your time by seeing this; you and your children will be bored to tears. Or maybe you'll laugh from embarrassment.