Teagan Luttrell

This movie is terrible, to say the least.  The way women are depicted in this dumpster of a film is atrocious. The lead actress was not right for this role, and it shows. Also, the incessant whining and moaning left my brow furrowed to the point of a headache. On a more positive note, the cinematography was great, and I deeply appreciated the transitions. though for some reason they just stopped halfway into it. The colors and set design really kept the immersion and made the movie feel slightly magical in a way. There was an unnecessary amount of nudity and sexual overtones (I can't even say undertones, as the whole movie was just sex). The featured nudity was heavily focused on the female anatomy. It gave a slight "porny" vibe, which didn't mix well with the horror side that it was trying to be.  The characters were far from likable. Thomas was just a personality-less cuck that can't understand the right time to leave such a failure of a woman. Ellen was just insufferable to watch. Her entire character was whining and being freaky on the high. The only reputable characters would be Friedrich and Willem Dafoe's character. They seemed to be the only ones with some rationality despite everyone's own spiraling mentality. The director clearly isn't over a breakup, as every woman in this film is killed off, even the CHILDREN. Every word spoken by a woman is followed by a moan or whine. The sexual tension between every single woman led me to wonder if they were going to fuck or not.  I find this movie a big slap in the face to the original Nosferatu. So many things that happened shouldn't have and seemed only put in for shock value. It didn't stick to the original plot at all at the halfway mark. Just a vague reference at the least. And for the ending, well, it was just poor taste. In the original Ellen tricks Nosferatu, pretending to bestow love and escape his curse, not this Ellen. The movie did a shit job at making it seem like Ellen didn't want to sleep with Nosferatu. She was practically begging for him, and honestly, it is quite sad that Thomas still loves her.  I am truly sad to have seen this film and am about to take an aspirin for this headache.

I don't know where to start. Everything was so bad. It was just so bad don't watch this if you plan on watching a shark movie.