Roy Porter

I mean if you have an extra $40 burning a hole in your pocket and are just looking to waste some time, the theater seats are decently comfortable and make a good place to play on your phone. But if you’re looking to be entertained for your money pick a different movie. While attempting to include multiple conflicts, the only one that really gets resolved is the main one. That main conflict just keeps coming back when it could have easily been efficiently neutralized or even eliminated early on. The highlights of the movie are slim. I mean the mama’s boy witness urinates on himself and proclaims it out loud when nobody would have noticed anyway. The psychopath mob hit man claims to have defecated on himself. The female US Marshall just fumbles around making mistake after mistake but luckily everything works out for her. The end.

My wife and I went to the movies last night and decided on The Fall Guy. Mainly because I was an 80’s kid and remember vividly all of those shows where the cars and the stunts were as much of a Celebrity or more as the actors. I have to say I was happy to see the 1980’s square body GMC with the lift kit and the roll bar with off road lights right at the start. Little did I know that it was to be the equivalent of a cameo appearance for the truck. Within a few scenes Colt was on a plane to Australia to work his stunt career for his love interest that is directing her dream project film. Neither the career nor the love interest had been developed for the audience yet so we are getting drug along for the ride. Personally I’d have rather stayed in the states with the old school square body GMC. I kind of had a feeling that the film was a bust for me when the cheesy love scenes began. It was quickly confirmed though when the brand new GMC Sierra four door pickup was introduced as Colts ride. This thing had the same color scheme and characteristics as the original truck but to me might as well have been a Chrysler Pacifica. I had a feeling that product placement would be prevalent with this GMC truck. In my opinion that was a huge miss. I may have not been as disappointed had he arrived to a brand new regular cab Sierra that was equally equipped as the original and stylish. GM could have benefited by potentially tapping into a niche retro market and sell a lot of reg cab 4x4 Sierra trucks. Plus the movie would have been just that much better with the co-star (the truck) resembling what it originally looked like instead of throwing a grocery getter in there. There really weren’t a lot of scenes with the truck anyway. What’s next??? Are they going to remake Bullet or Gone in 60 seconds with a four door Mustang Mach E as the “Star car”?? Yeah the truck was the major let down for me. But the rest of the movie was a bust for me too. Couldn’t tell what was what. The main character was high on drugs (someone slipped drugs into his drink) and seeing unicorns when the conflict was developing. I wasn’t sure if the guy was in reality or just hallucinating the conflict until way late in the movie. Yeah I know I’m old and surely will be accused of not being in touch with todays culture. This movie was clearly developed for a younger audience that wasn’t alive when these shows were on television. That’s what makes this movie even more ridiculous though. By resurrecting these old shows they are targeting the old fans. Yet they are delivering a final product that is catering to a different demographic entirely. If you are over 40 just skip this movie and stay home watching reruns of the television series or go to a car show. Lol.