Kaisha Martinez

If I could un-watch this movie I would. Save yourself the money and just watch the trailer a couple of times because it is eons better than the movie itself. I came to the reviews to read all of the negative ones, and they did not disappoint. Some of my favorites are as follows: “28 inches later” “If you liked 28 days later, you’ll probably hate this.” “Unfortunately Google forces me to give this film a star.“ “I haven’t been this disappointed since my Dad told me he was going to see 28 Weeks Later 13 years ago and never came back.” “This movie has many floppy zombie penises. It should have been called 28 Penises Later” “…reeks of the filmmakers sniffing their own farts surrounded by yes men.” “I hope it's another 28 years before the next one comes out.” I took my boyfriend, who has never seen any of the ‘28 days’ movies, and what an embarrassment that was. If the vibe was meant to be a mix between ptsd flash back, a bad acid trip, and a twisted Monty Python mashup, then they absolutely nailed it! The people who are leaving 5 star reviews must be watching a different movie all together. SO MUCH zombie dong(at least that actor/UFC fighter has a lucrative pornography career ahead of him), a super bizarre zombie birthing scene, apocalypse Wish tracksuit ninja’s, and a death with dignity moment. It felt like I was having a fever dream, except I’ve had fever dreams that make more sense. I lost count of how many times I said “WTF?”. It’s just one of those movies that keep going, and you keep asking yourself where the plot is, or where the story is going, and then it ends. So much confusion. So many questions. Why does the wackadoodle, iodine covered, zookeeper style human doctor only have medical supplies in the form of iodine, ketamine, xylazine, and a makeshift crematorium that only burns the flesh but not the bones? Whats up with the outdoor Capuchin Crypt? Why was there so many dicks? What was the point of the birthing scene at all? What in the actual fuck did I just pay $34 to watch? Anyway, I’m no movie critic, but that was some next level dumpster fire dog shit. I have a pretty open-minded respect for movies that are on the more “artistic” side, but that was something else entirely. I wouldn’t have watched that movie for free. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it most certainly was not that.