Nicole Thomas – Google

First, if you are reviewing this film and never saw the actual film, just stop. If you don’t like Jane Fonda, fine; but, don’t put your biases into a film review that you didn’t bother watching. Second, that being said, the movie tried too hard. They tried to give each actress her personal story and it failed across the board. Cliche portrayals: we need a sensible nerd, we need the sexy friend, we need the sentimental widow; I felt like I was watching the cast of Mamma Mia 70 years later. Each actress was given her own unbelievable scenario. You can be a big time gambler, you can eat hot sauce like no one else on the planet, you find love in 3 seconds, and you can barge into an offense coaching skybox on Super Bowl Sunday in your rhinestone jersey and Chic jeans and save the day. Dancing scenes thrown in as gratuitous and just not funny.

Since my trip to Poland was canceled due to COVID, I jumped at the chance to watch this when I read “Polish mafia thriller.” Thinking I was getting the Warsaw version of The Godfather, I was ready for a movie I couldn’t refuse. What I got instead was the twice-removed step brother of 50 Shades. Since our main character (antagonist or protagonist?) was hotter than Hades I decided it was worth a watch. I was greeted with maybe the world’s guiltiest pleasure next to Showgirls. No plot, no profound dialogue, and no redeemable characters didn’t slow this humpfest down. Beautiful settings, beautiful clothes, and beautiful people more than made up for it. Not to mention a butt I could bounce a quarter off. Set your expectations low, pour a glass of wine, and prepare for great boat sex. Finally a win for the 2020 column.