bella mawdesley

Amazing amazing book. It is a fiction written in the first person narrative which is one of the main reasons why the book draws you in right away. I was able to read this book in 2 days, it’s so incredibly addicting I could not put it down once I started reading. What I love most about this book is as it switches from the early 2000’s to 2017 over and over again, I felt like I was in the mindset that Vanessa had throughout the years. This book really helps you to understand Vanessa, especially in a way that Vanessa doesn’t understand about herself. She is so disconnected from the reality she lives in and of what happened that you feel the anger and pity building up inside of you. Strane’s character is so well thought out as well that in the moment when he’s manipulating and gaslighting Vanessa, it felt like he was manipulating and gaslighting me as well. For moments in the book I really believed the things strane was saying to Vanessa to justify himself, he was so convincing. Words can’t describe how much I loved this book, but also how much it destroyed me. As I got deeper in the book I felt myself becoming more and more into the mind of Vanessa, it is inevitable for the book to end, so when the book came to a sudden stop, I felt that was me. The ending was bittersweet and refreshing, and yet I feel this empty pit in my heart and mind. I love Fiona apple and the book as a significant amount of Fiona apple references, listening to Fiona whilst reading really helps you to understand Vanessa to a deeper level. When Fiona apple sings she sings with her teeth clenched sometimes because of pent up anger. I feel that really resonates with Vanessa and her built up anger that she was forced to suppress. This being Kate Russell’s first novel is just insane. Authors who have many published books and have been writing for years couldn’t even make the piece of art that is My Dark Vanessa. This is one of the best books I’ve ever read and it is going to take a long time to find something that even compares to this. trigger warning for this book!!!! sexual abuse, rape, pedophilia, etc.