Willie Miesmer

Tenet is the rare blockbuster: Sleek, sexy, and impossibly expensive, it offers viewers the chance to experience what Alzheimer's feels like for the duration of its nearly 3 hour runtime. Blink and you miss something. Keep your eyes open and you miss something, too. Who IS that child the heroine never stops talking about? He never shows his face, utters a word, nor has so much as a minor on screen interaction, so one can be forgiven for not knowing (or caring) who he is, his central role in the plot be damned. One thing's for sure, though: Those who wear red move forwards in time, while those who wear blue, backwards. It's just physics. Thinking of genius visual guideposts like these must have distracted Nolan and crew from developing the rest of the story. Anyways, a conventional story is far beneath Nolan's loftier aims: We're all better for knowing, finally, NOT to touch one's future self, should they be encountered, that fire turns to ice when one is "inverted", and that temporal pincer movements are THE way to execute any time-based attack worth its salt. One question though: If the future is so pissed at us because of climate change, wouldn't they travel back in time to stop Tenet's $200million dollars worth of Hollywood carbon from entering the atmosphere? Whoa: Alzheimer's is a rush.