David J

First time I'm writing a movie review. I see no alternative as it is my civic duty to warn others away from this weak montage of illogical plot twists and overused movie tropes. The movie is rated R/PG13 but I can't imagine anyone over 6 being able to suspend disbelief sufficiently for more than 30 minutes as 'clues' and artifacts are uncovered at an inhumanely alarming rate. Stay away unless you are there to perve at the main actor's pecs and/or pouting.

Don't listen to the critics - they are not the target market for this movie! Frankly, they are writing themselves out of a job. This flick is for kids of all ages who grew up on Mario or are currently eating and sleeping Nintendo and want to feast on clichés, game references and Easter eggs!