Dong Duong
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Its like CDI Zelda and Mario had a baby but it got cursed with every genetic abnormality, vomits everywhere and constantly screams for someone to put them out of their misery.
10/10 would play watch that spider get squashed again.
The Town with No Name
31 likes
Review·5y
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I'm going to go on the record first that I love Ryan Reynolds.
Netflix gave our good friend Michael Bay 150 MILLION to green light whatever tickled his 16 year old pre-pubescent directorial fantasies.
This can be a good or bad thing depending on how you felt about his prior works. By the end you're either chanting 'MURICA' and pumping your fist or reaching frantically for the nearest alcoholic bevarages in order to numb yourself for the journey ahead.
This 2 hour slog has all his trademark tropes: US military glorification, OTT gore/profanity to give 'edge', repeated slow motion action/car chases and those close up sex scenes inspired from the 90s VHS days of Girls Gone Wild.
Reynolds was charismatic but he still couldn't save this film. I genuinely think Bay doesn't know about cuts and edits in directing and that there are more ways to stylise action than SLOOOOWWWW DOWN. Zack Snyder already patented that technique and at least his movies actually had a story.
Bay needs to do what the cartoonish 1-dimensional dictator antagonist did; get thrown out of a helicopter to get torn apart by an angry mob.
Merry Christmas Netflix. This can f*** right off.
6 Underground
126 likes
Review·5y
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