Nicole Mendez

*spoilers included* This book was a little hard for me to get into…but I read on and eventually could semi get into it for the male love interest and curiosity of how it would end/resolve. I was disappointed with the ending and felt decidedly UN-resolved. I didn’t particularly like the main characters “voice.” Maybe it was hard for me to relate to her- name dropping designers she was wearing, midcentury furniture pieces in her home, the places she’d been. It all screamed of affluence which I had to accept would be the most plausible way any one would find themselves in a position to meet and carry out a relationship with a celebrity jet setting around the world. But it just wasn’t relatable for me and so put me off with the constant reminder of her affluence. At one point she used this phrase “I was of the right socio-economic class” in reference to her being able to get into a fancy hotel unlike the thousands of fans outside trying to get in. Something about that phrasing really put me out. Believe me I get that we’re painting a picture here of the kind of life some people may have, and again it would make this story more realistic because someone without money would have a hard time picking up and going anywhere for an affair but it just was frustrating to read. I didn’t love her personality either… I read her as sarcastic and judgmental, and that’s about it. The male love interest… I found him charming at times. I suppose I liked him. But I kept waiting for the shoe to drop. The explicit scenes. I don’t have too much of an opinion on them but sometimes the frequency of them just made me want to skip ahead. The ending. I’m not a fan of an abrupt ending. I get that life can be abrupt. Bad news and breakups and death and all the things- can be abrupt. Not everything gets resolved with a pretty bow. I get that. But it’s not my cup of tea to have a book just suddenly end without giving me some sense of what happens after. How did our characters continue on, how did they grow? What did they do or find? What was next? It honestly felt like a bit of a slap in the face. I’m torn because there’s a quote in the book itself, the main characters father says something along the lines of ‘art should be made because you want to make something beautiful. Not just to shock.’ I’m completely paraphrasing. So I look at the ending and I ask, is it beautiful or is it shocking? Was this fully intentional as the natural and best way to end the story because it was what the author wanted to say about relationships and life? Or was it somewhat a way to shock the readers and leave an impression on us? Like I said, I’m torn on that last bit. All in all, it was not the easiest read to get into but after awhile I kind of started to enjoy some aspects of it. At times I felt the heartache of what it’s like to be in a relationship that is doomed, or with the beautiful tall boy who you don’t want to love because you’re afraid he’ll break your heart. My heart ached for the boy who is crushed because of first love and first heartache and all that. That said, I’m not sure I would read this a second time.