Simon Riley

Guardians of the Galaxy meets The Island of Dr Moreau. Remember the fun story and heart at the centre of the first Guardians movie? Remember enjoying the story and character interactions? Well since you liked that movie, we decided to give you something completely different! Now we have a bleak story filled with animal mutilations and gore, main characters who scream a lot at each other, and endless explosions played out to a soundtrack of hits from the 90s. Oh! And the ending is a downer too. The movie is so convoluted, and poorly told, it thinks having a cool soundtrack is a legitimate narrative device, guiding us, as it does, from one boring scene to another, usually accompanied by a cacophony of noise from all the explosions taking place. I may as well be watching a Transformers movie. Character development and interaction takes backseat. All noise and no heart. Utter garbage. Whoever was the real creative force behind the first film, either left the building after that film, or else has had a labotomy. RIP.