Dan Palmer

We were conned by the 50s styling and the big names in the cast. We became worried about 5 minutes into the movie, but we stayed on, hoping for something coherent to happen. For some sort of storyline to unfold. My wife gave up before the hour and tried to fall asleep for the remainder of the film. This movie seems to have been written by a bunch of script writers on a night out, who randomly selected clichéd scenes from other movies, stuck them together with the intention to write a semblance of a plot at a later date and then promptly forgot. I cannot decide whether this movie is simply an exercise in extracting money from an audience whilst expending the minimum amount of creative effort. Or if it is genuinely trying to be clever by creating a movie about nothing. In which case, it is so self-obsessed that it has forgotten that it should at least try to keep its audience awake. I'm unable to describe just how dire this movie is. You'd have to watch it yourself to understand the true mind-numbing boredom it induces. But don't. Save your money and find some wet paint to watch for a while. It'll be more entertaining.