Joyce M

Spoiler alert! The mustache is symbolic of the reality I hold as true. Do I let my reality get in the way of staying present, and staying in relationship with my core people? Or do I switch to an environment and people that won’t judge and don’t care what I believe, where I can just drift, going nowhere and be accepted. This movie also touches on the experience of coping with what appears to other people to be mental illness. The person who is being accused may feel they need to run away in order to survive. But they may cope/survive by going ahead and entering into the reality of those around them (knowing full well they are pretending in order to get along). I want to be a trusted person to those with mental illness around me. I don’t want to make them feel like they need to sensor themselves, that I can’t handle what they are experiencing, or that I’m not a safe sounding board. Sure, it can be exhausting at times but Agnes didn’t let him share at all without completely crumbling. It sucks to be her. She insists everything being congruent with her reality. In fact we all insist to some extent (vacation story at dinner with friends). So back to the original assessment of the movie, that it’s symbolic of truths I hold dear. For example: Can I let the democrat hold their truth while I hold my republican truth? Can I tolerate that their math and my math clash in completely different realities (Hayek vs Keynes)? Or do I have to surround myself with a different world than them to be able to cope and feel safe? And there’s some places where we must interface….this movie gives some insight into what we do internally to cope.

This fantastic movie (it doesn’t feel like a series) is deeply profound and funny. It proposes that the life we create here (internally) is the same one we get in the next life (externally). Can we get out of a boring life? Can we improve? Or will we stay the same forever? I love the way marriage is depicted as a vehicle and obstacle to self-expansion. It’s a vehicle as we use it to become better communicators, negotiators and partners with life. It’s an obstacle as we make assumptions that we never crosscheck, blame, build resentments, and then act disingenuously to try to get our need met for an exciting life. This movie reminds me that it takes courage AND letting go of cultural baggage AND personal baggage in order to be honest with myself. I don't have to use substances, anger or steal energy from others in order to be courageous and honest. If my honesty comes only late in life then I must be brave and let it come. Honesty helps me choose love, laughter and adventure! ….and if a devoted partner will choose it with me, bonus!!