Eric Rockwell

This is horror for the slop era. My girlfriend made me watch this and while there were hints of an interesting story behind all the gratuitous violence, whoever made this junk is more interested in milking more slop out of this franchise than writing an interesting story. This should have been the end. The violence is not convincing and things like the chainsaw and liquid nitrogen tank require too much suspension of disbelief even for a low rate slasher flick. I sat through this whole bloody snooze fest hoping for some sort of actual resolution, since there’s no way any self respecting filmmaker could take this past a trilogy, but no. It ended just like the last two movies, which gets less satisfying every time. I will not be watching any fourth installment.

I’m a hardcore Trekkie but my girlfriend is not and she enjoyed the first two episodes as much as I did. It’s equally accessible to hardcore fans and the uninitiated alike. There’s plenty of inside jokes for Trekkies, and plenty of the clever comedy that Mike McMahan honed on Rick and Morty and Solar Opposites that is for everyone. Unlike other new Trek shows, this show is entirely procedural. Despite being a comedy, the show hews much more closely to Federation dogma than Discovery or Picard, which explore much more morally ambiguous plots (Seven of Nine going full on Kill Bill for example). The show takes place in a canonical sweet spot — the year 2380, which is after Voyager’s return and the Dominion war but before the Romulan supernova. The characters are great, although my inner Trekkie wonders why an Orion joined Starfleet. Probably to show the Federation’s continuing expansion. The real star character is ensign Beckett Mariner, who we’re introduced to in a state of being hammered on Romulan ale and carelessly swinging a bat’leth. She is an instant classic. It’s hard to not compare her in some ways to Michael Burnham (from Discovery), because she is similarly brilliant and charismatic and also has a checkered past that resulted in her losing rank. She’s definitely not Michael Burnham — more like a combination of Michael Burnham and Rick Sanchez, but she is definitely an equally great woman of color in a lead role (and let’s not forget to mention the equally fantastic Michelle Hurd/Raffi of Picard while we’re at it) and I love that Trek is staying progressive and promoting the same optimistic view of human potential even in a completely different genre. Ensign Mariner’s antics alone are enough to make this show great, but the nuance in the show is truly brilliant. In the second half of the season they did something awesome. In 2380 every Trekkie wants to know about the aftermath of the dominion war on Cardassia and the lead up to the Romulan supernova. This show is in the sweet spot for some serious canon expansion and they make you think they’re going to Cardassia in one episode and then don’t. S1E8 featured a mission to Romulus and almost zero Romulans. I think this is hilarious and an excellent cheeky jab at fandom in general. With two episodes left in the season this show has really hit its stride and needs to be renewed.

Okay, right away I’ll admit that as an amateur mycologist myself the spore drive strains credulity in a way nothing else from Trek ever has. It’s still cool and gave them an excuse to name a character “Paul Stamets”. Anthony Rapp plays that role to perfection. Yes, the show is dark, violent, and somewhat morally ambiguous. It’s not bright and idealistic like TNG, but I seriously think this show gets better every time I watch it. First of all, the cast is superb. Step aside Janeway, Michael Burnham is the best female lead from any Trek show period, although Mariner from Lower Decks gives her a run for her money. They also managed to get the greatest female action star of all time (Michelle Yeoh) in an awesome supporting role that I think is her best character since Wai Lin in Tomorrow Never Dies, who was arguably the best Bond girl ever. Michelle is almost 60 and still does her own stunts. How awesome is that? Anyway in case I haven’t already said it enough, the casting is phenomenal. Bringing in Tig Notaro for her signature deadpan was the only way to make comic relief work in this show and it’s a truly inspired choice. I can’t wait to see who they bring in for season 3, because the loss of Anson Mount will be felt. Yes, season two was a little sloppy and the time travel/red signal stuff in particular is messy, but it still made for a compelling story that did a fantastic job of developing (and killing off a few of) the main characters. I understand why some Trek purists don’t like this show, but in anticipation of season 3 I wanted to put this review based on multiple watches out there. This show is top notch. If there were parts you didn’t like during the first watch, watch it again. In the beginning I was way too critical of the show (season one gets a lot of grief but has the best mirror universe arc of any Trek show ever). It will grow on you like it did on me. I like to mention my non-Trekkie girlfriend in my reviews of these shows, because if she likes them that’s a good sign of their broad appeal. She loves discovery even though she can’t stand the old shows.

This is another one where the detractors are a loud minority. Season one was epic. Trek has completely ignored the Romulans since DS9. In DS9 the Tal Shiar was obliterated by the Dominion, and then in 2387 their star went supernova. The Romulans have had a tough time and Picard brings the aftermath into the canon brilliantly. The Romulan villains, Oh and Narissa, were a little too cheesy and mustache twirling for my liking, like they came out of the mirror universe. The third Romulan villain, Narek, is much more nuanced and maybe not entirely bad. The part of season one that got the most grief was the android arc. Soji and her true identity were kind of the b-plot for the first half of the season. The time spent on the cube subjected to Narek’s manipulating and gaslighting was hard to watch, but still important to the story, I guess. The casting is solid. Not as good as Discovery but solid. Patrick Stewart is always excellent, but my favorite characters are Rios (and his holograms) and Raffi. Elnor is a very interesting character, being absolutely candid, sweet, innocent, and extremely deadly at the same time. After Narek’s gaslighting, it’s pretty obvious he’s going to be the love interest for Soji. The only thing that was a little too ham handed was Seven of Nine’s return. She’s always awesome, but the Kill Bill style revenge arc they throw her right into is just a little cheesy, and so are her lines every time she gets revenge. On that note, the extremely graphic death of Icheb (the ex borg kid from Voyager) was pretty over the top. I had to keep reminding myself those were cables attached to his eyeball. The end of the season could have been done a little better. I wanted to see more of the sythetic Lovecraftian monsters. A few mechanical tentacles poking out of a portal was a let down.