Clive Roberts

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I’m writing this whilst watching episode 5 - with the rating rapidly slipping from 5 stars down to 2 as the episodes progress, so I’m graciously writing this now before it gets to the inevitable 0 stars, if that’s actually a thing. If that sounds like a rambling paragraph, I must have picked up the bad habit from this series which is full of the most bizarre irrelevant discussions, speeches and monologue stories ever to have existed since Scooby Doo. I desperately wanted this to be a great series after the previous ‘Haunted On’ series 1 & 2, but it just got more and more awful as it went on, a bit like one of those fantastic stories you start to write as a kid at school until you run out of brilliant ideas halfway through and then rush through the second half racing to the end skipping through any logic until you stumble across a sentence or an action that allows you to finish so you can go play football in the street with your mates. The script is just rambling religious nonsense, most of which bears no relevance to the story. Padding out the script as I’m doing now is the best description. I could write episode 6 by just continuing to write about nothing or anything chaotic and shouty. It’s like being on some crazy trip. I’m just hoping Stanley Baxter appears as a crazed vicar any moment now and I realise that this was just a spoof. I will however see it through, because quite simply, it is now so bad, it is addictive and I suspect I am now part of an everlasting cult. There is hope though. That maybe I can write a new hit series for Netflix - whilst I’m asleep, having my teeth pulled out and dreaming some very weird dreams after eating way too much cheese.