Kaso Montaso – Google

It was the day I visited the Crossmaglen Fair, I was walking along the grassy path and I sighted a pack of Dwarf's, approximately eight of so huddled around a black man, who they were painting green and shouting "ORC ORC". I watched perplexed at this sight, as it was without doubt one of the most baffling incidents I had ever encountered. The 'Orc' I began to notice was pleading for his life, his eyes desperate and fearful, as though he knew his fate, which in the eyes of a common observer was ambiguous. His pleas were ignored and he was bound and hung by the arms on the branches of a gnarled tree. The 'Orc' had begun screaming now, as whatever fate had ascribed him was now becoming a near reality. I then witnessed his fears, the Dwarf's had produced an arsenal of siege equipment and weaponry. I shudder contemplating back on this events as I recall Dwarf's holding battering rams, whips, Warhammer's and Lances. One Dwarf in particular held a sinister looking weapon which may have been a cross between a mace and hammer. This particular Dwarf who I prominently recall said to the 'Orc', "You know why you are here Tyrone, you broke your Duolingo streaks now I break your legs." After the absurd statement he then smashed his weapon into the legs of the 'Orc', howling in pain the animal, unable to escape his calamity began increasing the volumes of his lungs, howling louder than the average black family does when KFC runs out of stock. After this episode had finished the next two Dwarf's, wielding a battering ram lined up and said, "This is for beating your chest and flinging feces at my wife you animal" and then a astonishing amount of power they smashed their battering ram into the rib cage of this 'Orc', resulting in several loud cracks emitting from his body. A similar occurrence continued for this 'Orc' at the hands of the other Dwarf's, with the offence often being intertwined with the punishment. Some Dwarf's accused the 'Orc' of running away from the 'work camps' they generously provided, and so used a whip to inflict pain, while others gave accusations of smashing ice cream cones against their child's head and so reasonably punished the 'Orc' by smashing a spearhead repeatably into the 'Orcs' temple while screaming obscenities. Now it was difficult to say at the time why these Dwarf's painted Tyrone the Orc green but the answer was soon discovered. The green paint was in fact oil mixed in with bacon grease, and was used for the next punishment which laid in store for Tyrone. The Dwarf's slowly lit a bonfire, proceeding to burn their victim alive, as they danced in a circle completing some form of Dwarven ritual, chanting about how this was a sacrifice to their esteemed sun God. After this ritual was completed and Tyrone was quite obviously dead, they took a group selfie and vanished. After observing this scene I sprinted to escape the scene, and now recalling upon this event I believe I have acquired one vital message from this event. Never underestimate the ferocity of Dwarf's.