Hamid M

The best part about this movie was the 2–3 naps I took during the first 30 minutes — which, frankly, felt more coherent than the film itself. The worst part? The complete nonsense I suffered through when I was awake. Picture this: an oversized, nude lumberjack zombie running around with his privates flailing in broad daylight as he rips people’s heads off. Not exactly my idea of tension or horror — more like pure absurdity. This “big threat” lumbers around almost killing the protagonist and the so-called man-o-war characters multiple times, only for them to keep doping it with morphine instead of finishing the job. Maybe they liked the view — who knows? Any positive review of this mess is, in my opinion, highly suspect and probably bought. This is easily one of the worst films I’ve ever seen — and I say that as someone who’s clearly had better dreams during a nap than whatever this movie was trying to be. Where is the ZERO star button?