Duncan Gibbs

I wonder how many people have already made a "Wrong Turn into the cinema" pun for this trite pile of garbage? This movie features six young planks of wood that hike the Appalachian trail for no explained reason— assumedly to "find themselves" or "discover a purpose" along the way. No backstory is given to how these pieces of wood met, nor how they know each other. One would be remiss not to wonder how a: sustainable energy, not-for-profit philanthropist; an oncologist; an app developer; two *mumble mumble* bistros; and an unemployed person with two Master's Degrees became acquainted with each other— especially at such a seemingly young age. Nevertheless, our intrepid group of planks find themselves in what the audience is led to believe is a hick town; it is rather difficult to tell the setting in which the movie is situated as the camera is inexplicably zoomed in on only the characters. I calculate that about 90% of this film is just the main characters shot from the waist up, and with only them in focus. Wouldn't it have made more sense to use the environment of an isolated forest to create tension for a movie about people being murdered in the woods? I predict a wide shot from the perspective of a stalker/killer in the woods would have done wonders for this film. I wouldn't have minded seeing or hearing less of our planks of wood, seeing as their first ten minutes on screen is spent making them the most unlikable people in the movie. Arrogant, abrasive, snide, disloyal, uninteresting, incompetent; by the end of the film I guarantee that you will be rooting for their death— so long as it means that we see less and hear less of them. Since the film has failed to provide a good movie, then perhaps there is a commentary or message that the "muh themes" troglodytes can latch onto. Well, the movie attempts to convey a message about... well I'm not sure what. Girl power? Racism? Homosexuality? Community? Perseverance? Loyalty? Perspective? Morality and Ethics? Retribution? Survival? If all those topics sound loosely connected, or long-winded, or overly abundant, or a mixture of them all, then you would be correct. Half this film is filled with frivolous messages about topics that require neither attention nor mention. The issues in the film are forced to either check boxes, fill quotas, or pad out run time until the film switches to blood and guts horror. If you are looking for a good movie, then avoid. If you are looking for fun, then more fun could be had watching paint dry. If you are looking for gore, then spend twenty minutes on the internet, and I am sure you will be sated. For now, I find this film guilty— for wasting time and money. The sentence is Darkness.