Colin Wechsler

Let me paint you a picture... It was a crisp autumn morning. The wind gusted through the colored branches above my humble home in upstate Maine. The birds could be heard chirping in the trees as the subtle splash of water from the lake near my house created an orgasmic atmosphere that would only get better from there. This is because that day was October 11th, and I was about to experience the inter generational phenomenon that is Will Smith’s Gemini Man. Near seconds after starting the movie, I could tell it was truly something special. The brilliant dialogue and generation defining acting and writing reminded me of my wife, who had just left with the kids mere hours ago. As I sat and watched the brilliant story unfold before me, I could feel a warm tear drip down my cheek. Never before had I experienced such an intense sexual experience as I did watching not one, but two Will Smith’s. I truly implore you, no matter your age, gender, interests, experiences, to experience this cinematic masterpiece at least once, because I can guarantee, it will be the best experience of your until now mundane and pointless life.

It’s a great, heartwarming show, but don’t be fooled into watching if you’re just looking for Kristen Bell. Although the advertisements make it seem like she’s the host, she appears at the beginning for 30 seconds, and then makes a brief cameo at the end to pep-talk the performers. Great show overall but I feel like they shouldn’t have pressed “Kristen Bell is in it” as hard as they did. Truly only watch if you enjoy the theater process (and if you can tolerate normal people singing and dancing with a skill level lower than those on Broadway), which I do.