Liz McLaughlin

Hilariously bad, and a great watch if that’s what you’re signing up for. The cast boasts giant talent capable of firing off pithy one-liners at roll-out speed while also possessing the character depth of puddles. Shiny set-pieces abound backlit by big explosions and they even throw in some haphazard drama-bait: a kid with cancer and a prolonged “I don’t know about this guy” relationship between too equally misguided military boys. And I think that’s sometimes what you want in a movie. You want to laugh at ChatGPT-esque writing, watch big robots kick the tar out of each other, and not think too hard about why anything is happening. Why did the tech wizard protagonist never do anything with tech? Why couldn’t the savant archeologist memorize literally four symbols and instead have to bring her whole backpack? Why did the gorilla robot transform into a man robot when a gorilla body is objectively better at combat? These questions are for the birds. And those birds? They’re actually space robots. 2/5 Had a great time, would never watch again.