J Scags – Google

I was so excited about this having thoroughly enjoyed every single episode at least five times back in the day. So I will start with the positives. It was wonderful to see the cast and producers back together and clearly enjoying each others company. Their interactions were revealing, humourous and touching in equal measure. The memories they shared, the anecdotes that were told and the general camaraderie that was obvious were gladdening and touching. So why, oh why, did they have to ruin it all with the inane, unfunny and dismal James Corden butting in at regular intervals with a question that perhaps a five-year-old had written? Friends is a legendary show and will live for many years more. Corden will be forgotten in a decade. This is a spectacularly missed opportunity. If you have 1h 44minutes to spare, watch a few episodes of Friends. Don't bother with this.

Well acted by all the main cast members with some tense moments along the way and well put together action scenes made this a real contender for best action flick of the year. Right up until the horrible CGI lions made an absolute mockery of it all. If I had acted in this I would be firing my agent for the terrible post-production. I have not seen anything so unrealistic in the last decade (and I watch a LOT of movies) and it totally ruined the whole experience. Watch if only to laugh at the 'special' effects. Shame.

Why does Zack Snyder always seem to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory? This was no different though it promised a lot - a novel premise of a heist during a zombie outbreak, a good cast and a whole armoured safe full of special (and they were pretty special) effects. So what went wrong? A plodding and at times, stationary story with no more than a modicum of character development didn't help. There was one interesting moment which saw a hint toward a potential plot twist which, unfortunately, never materialised. And that was the turning point for me. If ever a movie was crying out for an intriguing plot twist, this was it. Instead, we just got Bautista et al running around with a big gun and being chased by a horde of the undead, relentlessly reaching without ever taking hold. A metaphor that Snyder knows only too well, unfortunately.

One star is generous. This is the worst acted, worst scripted and worst overall 'movie' that I have endured. And I have watched some rubbish. From start to finish this is dogged by terrible, literally unbelievable, plotting and dialogue. The acting is diabolical and I would recommend that the casting agent be dismissed for crimes against the industry. Toby Jones would be wise to fire his agent and never speak of this again. At one point it was impossible to determine the accent that one particular actor was trying to achieve - was it English, American or South African? You'll know as soon as you hear it. Pinocchio would have been less wooden than the majority of this cast. This is a stinker. No two ways about it. Easily the worst film of the year. Do not waste your time. Go and watch some grass growing. You will be more entertained and less irritated. By far.

It isn't long at around two hours but it FEELS long. The first hour and a half is pointless. There's one laugh in it - two at most. The plot advances like a lazy slug that's just woken up after a big night out. Reynolds thrives on snappy dialogue so it's a shame that the writers never thought to include any. I love a good swear and was expecting it - I mean, Sam Jackson's catchphrase is Mother......... Done right, it can add to the humour but with there being very little humour in this script, the bad language was left hanging in the air after almost every sentence and it just felt forced. This movie is action-packed and there's lots of fight scenes. Some are pretty good. Some are of a standard that can be seen in any am-dram class. In one scene a bad guy gets his head banged into a trailer wall three times. Unfortunately, it is achingly obvious that he brushed it once and missed it completely twice despite three 'clangs' to the contrary. This is the standard throughout. IN SHORT: They blew the budget on car chases and explosions and forgot to hire a fight specialist and a script writer. A real stinker. Even Salma Hayek's unhinged 'wife' couldn't save it (she was the only good thing in it). NOTE TO MORGAN FREEMAN: What are you doing? Stop it.

Ridiculous premise. Terrible movie. From start to finish this movie excelled itself as a Warner Bros cash cow - and not much else. Reasonable special effects masked plodding fight scenes which culminated in a predictable, unsatisfying and poorly written ending. There are so many better films out at the moment that you are committing crimes against Hollywood by spending two hours of your life on this trash. Watch 'Nobody' instead - plenty of action and, most importantly, a plot that wasn't sketched out on the back of a cigarette packet. Lets hope this is the last time we see either of these 'characters'. If I could have given no stars, I would have. Shame on you Warner Bros.

I have really enjoyed all of Tarantino's previous films including the earlier ones like Killing Zoe and True Romance. They had vim and vigour, a bouncing soundtrack, great performances, plenty going on and solid, believable dialogue. I expected nothing less here, with a stellar cast and the opportunity to give the movie-goer an interesting glimpse behind the curtain. Except, what happened behind the curtain was just dull. Yes, it looked fabulous and clearly a lot of time was spent making it so. It's a shame that a similar level of attention was not lavished on the story or the dialogue. This film feels LONG. It is long. It's 2 hours 40 minutes long. But it felt longer. I zoned out so many times because you just don't care what happens to the characters. Why this has been feted as a masterclass I cannot begin to imagine. This is a very poor film. But it does look jolly nice. So there's that. If there are 'behind the scenes' extras on the DVD they should be titled 'Tarantino - After The Magic Has Gone' Save your money. This one's a stinker.

There's Something Wrong with the Children

Ok, it wasn't AWFUL. But it was some way off being good. The story has been done a million times before and a million times better. Off-grid cabin leads to off-key horror which at times, bordered on the comical. It's difficult to single any one actor out for criticism because they were all so, so bad. Laughable even, at times (the kitchen scene when the kids go missing, is a lowpoint). This is a really BASIC movie, with BASIC acting and BASIC storytelling. You could do worse than watch this, but you could do so much better.