Pam Keith

I initially enjoyed this show and the actors. However, I have NEVER been so offended by a show's lack of research or empathy in a story line, regardless that it is based on fiction. I am a non fictional 48 year old recent widow. I belong to several social media world wide support groups as well as a local group of widowers and widows. The show that aired on July 17, 2019, is extremely hurtful, disturbing and severely thoughtless to people who have actually lost their spouse/partner. One of the most repeatedly asked and discussed questions by widows/widowers is when or if to remove their wedding ring or engagement ring. We all feel an attachment and some choose to continue to wear their rings for the remainder of their lives. It brings us a sense of comfort. Some simply switch fingers, but to every single one of us, it is an important and painstaking decision. For the majority, they do continue to wear their ring. It brings a sense of peace and is not a painful reminder of the life we lost; but instead, it becomes a joyful reminder of the life we had. It is the most difficult loss anyone will ever experience; but, obviously from this insensitive story no one involved with this program has walked through this journey. We each struggle with trying to understand what happens when our spouse dies and search desperately for answers. To imply that because we choose to wear our wedding rings it has kept our spouse "caught" repeating the cycle of their death is nothing short of cruel. My husband was 48. He died over a 5 week period from multiple cancers that ravaged his body and stole him from our family. He suffered in extreme pain and the moment he died is burned into the minds of me and our children. Most spouses who witness their spouse's death suffer from PTSD. That is how awful it is to see the person you love suffer and leave this world. Others who don't witness the death, still suffer from PTSD from not having been present, wondering and picturing what their spouse may have gone through. We have to tell ourselves, and our children, that they are at peace, no longer suffering, and that they are with us. This is the only possible way for a lot of us to keep getting out of bed each day. Your show may be a fictional drama; however, when dealing with a sensitive and true to life subject matter, I would have thought someone in your cast and crew would have some sensibility. This show upset and angered me very much and I am certain there are others who feel the same way.....or worse, and are questioning their choices. I am only grateful my children didn't see this episode! If it gave me pause for thought and a sickening feeling, then it most certainly would have upset them. I can't even imagine their thoughts or their pain in thinking that by me continuing to wear my rings to honor their father and our marriage, that this somehow means my husband is now "caught". For them to think he "isn't at peace" and instead is stuck in his tremendous pain and the horror of him repeatedly taking his last breath is absolutely appalling. Shame on all of you for putting those thoughts out in to the world where some of us actually are living it!